Several months ago, Dylan and I walked into a wedding planner’s office to drop off a wedding print.  While he hung it on her wall, she asked me if we would be interested in photographing a styled shoot for a new wedding venue that was opening on Canyon Lake.  As she described the venue and her connection to it, I knew it would be pretty, but was hesitant.  The hesitation didn’t come from the work, the venue, or the people around it.  The hesitation came from within.  It sounded like a GREAT opportunity and one that would be fun to do, but I lacked the confidence to say yes.  Not the confidence in my ability to make great images, I KNOW I can do that.  The doubt was in my ability to organize what seemed at the time to be a monumental mountain of details to get together this faux wedding.

How would I ever find a dress?  How would I even style a wedding day?  Who would donate a shoot’s worth of floral to ME, including a bridal bouquet?  Who do I know that would be willing to drive out to Canyon Lake in the middle of summer to let me take their photos in a mock wedding and be willing to sweat it out in wedding attire?  Do I know anyone who might be willing to do make-up?  What about hair?  What about the furniture to stylize a shoot?  And all the plates, cups, and cutlery needed?  Who would do all of this for my shoot Pro-Bono?

All of these and more were questions that I just could not put out of my head, one detail seemed to lead to another detail and another and another.  I suffer from the disease my husband calls “perfectionist.”  I am unable to attend to some details and then leave others, so the task just seemed to grow and grow the more I thought about it.

It was a very, very tough and heart-breaking time for me.  I had been blessed with this great opportunity but now could not for the life of me figure out how I was going to get the resources together to take advantage of it.   I got to the point where I felt like the person in the movies whose ship has just sunk: here I am in a life raft, floating about on the ocean. When I see a ship coming by, I do not even have the strength to paddle over to it and save myself.

Dylan was, of course, the most supportive and encouraging partner, as always!  

He constantly reminded me that she wouldn’t have asked if she didn’t think I was going to do a good job OR wouldn’t be supportive of the endeavor.  My “whoomp-whoomp” attitude of self doubt was PIT-I-FUL!  It was one of those things where you wish you could go back in time and slap yourself upside the head.  Twice!

Well, it was not even a week before I got the message saying “don’t forget – if you want to be the photographer for the new wedding venue, the date is fast approaching!”  Then, my heart did a back flip with excitement! Then, … the questions started, again.  So, I started where any girl starts to plan a wedding (even if it was a mock-wedding): PINTEREST!!!

I just started pinning photos I liked just because I liked them.  I wasn’t looking for anything in particular, just pretty photos that caught my eye.  When I took a break to look at what had actually been pinned, I found that I really wanted to shoot something that reminded me of Austin: a bohemian/hippie-vibe, with organic decor, and fun details like bike rides and Toms.  Thus, I HAD envisioned a shoot and saw the possibilities for it!!  YAY!  That was step 1 and I HAD accomplished it!  Check!

With the new Pinterest board in hand, I sent over my idea to the wedding planner who helped to hone it in to a cohesive look.  That is, after all, one of the many perks of working with a wedding planner!  We decided to go even more Austin-y and ditched the table setting altogether, opting for a picnic dinner for two!  That crossed several things off the list of things to find!

The next step was finding the models, so I posted on Facebook that I was looking for a husband/wife pair to be the stars of my stylized shoot!  The response was overwhelming and I’m so very thankful to everyone who offered up their time!  Thank you!

The bride model happens to be an oh-so-talented wedding photographer in Austin, so she had connections to a bridal boutique that let us borrow a dress!  Dylan knew a hair and make-up artist who has been in the industry for over a decade and she so graciously volunteered to help!  He also spoke to a florist in Georgetown that he frequents and was able to get a bouquet!  We already had a picnic basket, wine glasses, and a quick trip to the grocery store completed the food necessities!  We made a DIY banner that read “Just Married” out of burlap that took less than 30 minutes.  A friend of mine knew I was looking for an old-school bike and saw one at his mechanics.  He asked the mechanic if we could borrow it, and the mechanic agreed (that was the most random part of the whole process)!

EVERYTHING came together so beautifully and I’m SO SO SO grateful that it did!  Through all of the self-doubting, there was a team of believers behind me who encouraged me every step of the way!  While I did have this “I don’t have enough.  I am not enough.” mentality, it wasn’t true.  I am SO BLESSED beyond belief.  I have this wonderful family who supports me in everything I do.  I have a great group of industry peers that help, encourage, and teach me.  And I serve a GOD who is bigger than all of us, who cares for us, and will carry us through the doubt.  HE can get us through all of our own insecurities.

While I learned all of that once the shoot came together, I was even more honored that the shoot that I was hesitant about, the shoot that caused me to doubt myself, was featured four times.  Yes, FOUR times!  These fabulous wedding bloggers apparently agree that the styled shoot that almost-wasn’t was a SMASHING success!

“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.”

– Mylah Renae

Austin Wedding Photographer

www.Eureka-Photography.com